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Smoke Screen

Photo credit - Sahil Mehta
As I sat there and waited patiently
Cigarette in hand and lost in melancholy
She sat by my side deploring, her anger visible to me
Hoping perhaps; from this habit of mine, to be free
I stared back pondering, trying to understand her
Trying ever so hard as I did so; to placate her.

She parted her lips; rosy as they were
Words stuck in between, waiting to unfurl
I couldn't understand for the life of me
Why couldn't she just let my smokes be!
It is not as if I were addicted yet
"I have just started, you know", I said.

She wouldn't listen, but kept quiet
I failed to see the reason for her to fret
"I won't keep this up", I said hoping to converse
I knew that instant though, I couldn't have done worse
She jumped at the opportunity; that of making me quit
She kept at me and I couldn't then quietly sit.

"Promise!" She cried, "Promise that to me!"
Said I, "I cannot! At least not yet; can't you see!"
She crumbled back into her layers; their depth unseen
I kept on thinking, "It was my mistake; I was too mean"
I tried pursuasion; some words mellow, others gruff
Remembering all the promised last puffs.

I remembered all those half hearted promises I had made
Promises left incomplete; their memories starting to fade
It was Autumn, leaves strewn around us as I now recall
They had turned yellow and brown and had begun to fall
I thought of things that I could say; so she could by swayed
I fell terribly short; I was lost and all my hope unmade 

I cleared my throat loudly, so she could hear
She was on the edge of cracking, I fear
I couldn't think, my judgement clouded and dense
And I realise now how it all makes sense
I reconsidered quitting and putting a time to it
But I was foolish; thinking I could quit.

'I'll help you' she said, reading my mind
Puzzled I asked, "Are my thoughts so easy to find?"
"Yes", she replied a smile warming up her face
All her anger and turmoil vanished leaving no trace
We got up, and strode together out of the park
My last ever cigarette lit; still glowing in the dark.


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